This is a sort of follow-up to my Back-Door Benefits of Fear post. In a nutshell: I got an unexpected day off to take my sick kid to the doctor, specifically because of our current world-health situation.
As a parent, you know when your kid is sick enough to warrant medical attention. For the record, my employer does not ‘recommend’ me staying home for a sick child, nor does he ‘suggest’ taking the day off to care for said child. So, when my employer ‘offered’ the day off ‘to take my child to the doctor’ (with a half-joking “Please take her to the doctor!” as I was leaving), I did just that. If I’d just been given the day off to care for my child, I would have monitored the situation a little longer.
My child had a fever. Just a fever, but that means no school.
I was unable to get to our regular doctor and had to go to an Urgent Care facility. The doctor asked when the fever started and I told him that I noticed it first when I pulled my child close to me and kissed her on the forehead and was surprised at how hot her skin was.
I was basically told that since I did not take her temperature with a thermometer, I could not possibly know that she actually had a fever, “maternal instincts aside”.
Give that a minute.
(I had to, because my first ‘maternal instinct’ at the moment was to slap him.)
He then proceeded to talk to me as if I were an alarmist parent who would waste a doctor’s valuable time every time my kid sneezed.
Yes, I was offended. At first, it was simply because this clueless doctor has no idea of job insecurity, maternal instincts, or me – because I’m the last person who would rush to a doctor. Where I’m from you learned to suck it up, cupcake. Doctor visits happened when something was about to fall off or when school rules required it.
I waited two days to write this because I realized I was more than just offended on my own merit. Yes, I admit to my own thoughts of condescension to the parents who seek medical attention for a sniffle and most definitely resented that condescension being directed at me.
But times are different right now. And the doctor should know that. Even if this is something we’ve been through before historically, this is the first time such a situation has fully entered the age of social media.
This educated man first should be aware that dealing with alarmist parents is part of his job (can I get an “Amen” from my fellow service-industry workers?). Then, he should remember that his job is patient care.
With his knowledge, he should also realize that this is a prime opportunity for him to educate the people he comes into contact with, especially during this time of global crisis.
Doctors, we have something going on right now that requires you to pay attention to all of your duties. Your job isn’t just treating the public, it’s dealing with the public. This day and age of social media does not just inflame the alarmists, it connects real people who will talk about good and bad service – and you provide a service that we pay healthily (pun intended) for.
Understand that what is going on right now is the equivalent for you of what a Sears employee would go through during the Christmas in July sale: greater mobs, heightened emotions, panic, and a bigger rush.
So suck it up, Cupcake, this is a part of your job. By mocking the very real fear that people are experiencing right now with your patronization and condescension, you are only allowing and encouraging it to spread.
Isn’t it your job to help fight the spread of anything viral?
Please, use this as an opportunity to teach, to share, to care for your patients.
TiaraMeSue 